Am I really such a horrible person?

[wolfwings]

I've been talking with my landlord/boss/friend sysable or Mark Merlino as most of you may know him as.

It's come to my attention that numerous people, including specifically ben_raccoon find me to be, to put it bluntly, an asshole.

So, I'm posting this as an open question. Have I really turned into that much of an asshole as of late towards everyone, or have I always been one, and simply not known it and/or been fooling myself that I was a good person? =-.-=

It seems like everyone and everything I care about has been slipping through my fingers, and it really, royally, sucks. dragonballx is something I was all raring-to-go for, but I can barely get the energy up to read the existing stuff, let alone post anything. And that's what was my driving force for a while, to say nothing of other things like all the Yahoo Groups I belong to.

I guess this is a huge post to ask for thoughts, especially from those that may not like me, as to how I can improve, or at least what they've seen me do wrong specifically so I can search for a way to improve, even if they can't tell me how.

And yes, I should be in bed, but I just can't get to sleep. =-.-=

Comments

[dennisthetiger.livejournal.com]

Maybe not an asshole - an asshole is...well, think Denis Leary. =^_^= There's also an undercurrent of pride to go along with it.

I think where the problem lies is that many people/furs/whatever who are hackers tend to not be adaptable socially. In short, when you get along with the computer at those levels, people sort of fall by the wayside, and you seem intense to them. One loses patience with these types simply because they don't hit your expectations as fast ("What? How come you can't figure out that 'kill -HUP `ps -A | grep X`' is another way you kill X from a prompt as root?").

(OK, that's a bad way to work kill, I know.)

So is it wrong? I don't know. I'm not the one to answer that. I wouldn't even necessarily say it's a fault. But if it's a trait you want to get rid of, don't expect it to go away overnight.

[mira-fastfire.livejournal.com]

oh LOL I'm nowhere near that level of understanding, but I sooooooo get frustrated when I have to go back to the uber-basics to help people. -.-;; Sigh...

Actually... 'killall X' would work too.

[wolfwings.livejournal.com]

But that my brain thinks of that before any other coherent response says something, doesn't it? =-.-=

Thank you for the thoughts, though I don't seem to understand how I can 'fix' that very readilly. =-.-= I try to be patient with people, but I've never been able to explain things verbally to others, I can demonstrate, and answer questions about it, but unguided explanation is something I've never been able to do. :-/